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The desire to interact with someone based on a variety of factors, including physical attractiveness, personality, rewards, proximity, or similarities.
Knapp and Vangelisti's Stages of coming together.
- Initiating-stage during which individuals meet and interact for the first time
- experimenting-stage of coming together that requires risk taking because little is known as yet about the other person
- intensifying-marks an increase int he participants commitment and involvement in the relationship
- integrating-the relationship has a sense of togetherness
- bonding-final stage in a relationship's development and growth is bonding, the public announcement of the commitment.
Knapp and Vangelisti's Stages of coming apart.
- Differentiating-the differences between the individuals are highlighted and become forces that slow or limit the growth of the relationship
- circumscribing-info exchange is reduced, and some ares of difference are completely avoided because converatinw ould only lead to a deepening of the conflict.
- stagnating-the relationship reaches a standstill at the stagnating stage
- avoiding-up to this point, the participants int he relationship are still seeing each other or sharing the same living quarters
- terminating-last stage in the breakup occurs when individuals take the necessary steps to end it
Signs to show a relationship is in trouble.
Aggressive behavior, lies, and betrayal.
Duck's phases of dissolution.
- the intrapsychic phase- people begin to internally asses their dissatisfactino with a relationship
- the dyadic phase-pepole in the relationship discuss the satus of their relationship
- the social phase-the relationship difficulties become more public within the ocntext of family, friends, co-workers, or other acquaintances
- the grave-dressing phase-after the breakup, each partner gives an account of why the relationship ended
Contradictory impulses that push and pull us in conflicting directions with others.
Dialectical theory: push and pull.
An expressed struggle between at least 2 interdependence parties who perceive incompatiable goals, scarce resources, and interference from others in achieving their goals.
Useful strategies for conflic management.
- withdrawing-when we choose to avoid further conlifct by either psychologically or physically removing ourselfs from the situation
- accomodating-does not assert his or her own needs but rather prefers to go along to get along
- forcing-one person has power and dominance over another person
- negotiating-a give-and-take process and leads to each party having some satisfaction and some dissatisfaction with the outcome
- callaboration-requires cooperation and mutual respect