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Deception –
violates both relational and conversational rules and is often considered a negative violation of expectations. It can harm our relationships.
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Lies –
Eckman defines as a one person intending to mislead another, doing so deliberately, without prior notification and without being asked to do so.
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Two types of lies:
- Benevolent – lies meant to “help” the other person; preserve the relationship
- Malicious – lies intended to harm another individual
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Concealing
is when the liar withholds some information without actually saying anything untrue
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Falsifying –
an additional step is taken. The liar withholds true information but also presents false information
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Equivocation –
indirect or ambiguous statement. Instead of saying you hate your friend’s hair, you might say “it’s the latest style”
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Exaggeration –
overstate or exaggerate the truth
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Understatement –
minimize the truth or downplay it
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When there is a choice in how to lie, people prefer
concealing to falsifying Why?
- It’s easier
- Its seems less responsible
- It is much easier to cover up or save face if discovered
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Motives for Lying
Partner-focused, Self-focused, Relationship-focused
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Partner-focused –
don’t want to hurt feelings or to help person maintain self-esteem
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Self-focused –
want to enhance or protect our own self image
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Relationship-focused –
limit relationship harms or conflicts
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