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Song; There's no cure like travel (P1)
Billy coming up the gang way; Excuse me Captain. Has Mr Whitney come aboard?
Mr Whitney is in the bar.
Billy: I thought you kept the bar closed till you sailed?
He had a note from his doctor.
Purser: Captain, Captain a catastrophe! We have to dely the sailying.
What is it?
Purser: Worse! Charlie Chaplin just wired. He's cancelling his berth and sailing on the Mauretania.
The passenger list.
(Looks through the list)
Hope Harcourt, the debutante,
That's not bad.
Purser: The Normandie had Jimmy Walker and Machie Gun Kelly.
Lord Evelyn Oakleigh.
Purser: Nothing. Wealthy Englishman.
Wait a minute (music stops)
Purser: It's not the same one.
Then we've got nobody! (music stars)
Quick, run down to the Stork Club
and see if anyone's left over from last night.
Purser: Aye Aye sir.
Reporters: Hay Captain, where's a;; the celebrities?
Photographer: This tub is deader than the Flying Duchman.
(A Minister entres with two Chinese)
Minister: Ah, gentalmen of the press.
I am Henry T Dobson.
Not THE Henry T Dobson.
(Pressmen groaning) Come off it!
(Captain exits P4/SL)