fam process

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fam process
2010-08-10 19:34:05
fam process

fam process
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  1. generativity
    care & concern for next generation
  2. how social capital influences generational relationships
    resources acquired based on social relationships
  3. generative concern and generative action
    • concern: desire to care for next generation as well as pass on knowledge & experiences
    • action: behavior that results from concern
  4. generational alliances and how they're formed
    subsystems created that influence cross-generational relationships.formed from stress and transitions
  5. healthy alliance
    • strong parental alliance
    • generationally centric
  6. unhealthy alliance
    • parent-child
    • coalitions- triangulation
  7. transitional characters
    one individual can change the course for an entire lineage
  8. generational transmission
    transferring knowledge, processes, beliefs & values to the next generation
  9. ideology
    beliefs, values, doctinres that govern individual group & community behavior
  10. family ideology
    family's thinking patterns, beliefs, values about world that dictate family process
  11. paradigm
    collection of thinking, beliefs, values that characterize a group.community
  12. family paradigm
    collective way a family views the world based on shared beliefs and values
  13. 1st order process
    visible to anyone who observes family
  14. 2nd order process
    themes and beliefs that family processes together and are generally held by all members
  15. paradigm formation
    • cultural connection
    • heritage connection
    • negotiated elements
    • lived experience
  16. schema
    how one structures, organizes, and understands the world around them
  17. assimilation
    incorporating differing view points/ideas into our existing paradigms and ideologies
  18. accommodation
    changing/restructuring world views based on new information
  19. open family
    • values communication & negotiation
    • willing to change/adapt
    • permeable boundaries
    • values group & individual
  20. closed family
    • rigid boundaries
    • tradition & loyalty
    • beliefs are steady and stable
    • clear hierarchy
    • family takes priority over individual
  21. random family
    • value creativity
    • individuals over family
    • very permeable boundaries
    • no structure
  22. synchronous family
    • emphasis on shared values
    • implicit communication
    • interaction limited
    • must know what is going on w/out talking about it
  23. folkways
    rules about less serious behavior
  24. mores
    rules about serious issues/behavior
  25. metarules
    rules about rules
  26. where rules come from
    • family paradigms
    • tradition
    • culture
    • experience
  27. rule discovery
    finding out what rules each partner previously used/valued
  28. rule negotiation
    discuss rule priorities based on previous experiences
  29. rule creation
    merging & bleding of previous rules to fit new family system
  30. reasons families have rules
    • boundaries: rules about information, access & interaction with others
    • resource allocation: rules about how resources are distributed in family
    • rules of responsibility: who is in charge of what
    • distance regulation: how close/separate we are
    • implementation: how other rules are implemented
    • exceptions: exceptions to rules
    • violations: violations to rules
  31. how rule sequences are created
    formed from repeated pattern of rules
  32. overt messages
    what we say
  33. covert messages
    clothing, hairstyle, facial expressions, body posture, etc.
  34. accuracy
    ability to be accurate in perception of communication
  35. bias
    innacurate interpretations
  36. sentiment override
    when our feelings/perceptions regarding the relationship influence our perception of communication messages
  37. harsh startup
    beginning a conversation with negative overt and convert mesages
  38. intersubjectivity
    sharing of thoughts between members of a system
  39. interactivity
    link between symbol creation and interaction
  40. aspects of healthy communication
    • seeking meaning: listening is key. hidden anxiety: losing the argument
    • seeking clarification: asking for help. hidden anxiety: fear of incompetence
    • seeking congruence: focusing on what we can do, lining up covert & overt messages. hidden anxiety: saying what's written on our face
  41. Gottman's Four Horsemen
    • criticism: blaming partner; "you always", "you never"
    • contempt: putting partner below you
    • defensiveness: defend yourself in the face of perceived attack
    • stonewalling: withdraw from interaction
  42. protective
    • obedience is key
    • little emphasis on open discussions
    • little value in explaining decisions
  43. concensual
    • struggle to agree yet explore new ideas
    • listen but it might not matter
  44. pluralistic
    • open communication invovling everyone
    • communication based on strength of argument, not hierarchy
    • kid's opinions are =
  45. lasseiz-faire
    • few discussions
    • little interactions
    • everyone makes own decisions, don't care what they are
  46. healthy distance regulation
    promoting individual skills and goals while maintaining closeness and intimacy in family
  47. family fusion
    • individual is disabled in family
    • driven by emotion
    • personal boundaries are weak
  48. family enmeshment
    • lack of tolerance of individual
    • psychological control
    • dependency
    • personal boundaries are permeable, family boundries are rigid
  49. disengaged
    • struggle with commitment and attachment
    • unable to turn to each other for support
  50. separated
    • time apart is more important
    • some family time and decisions
    • few shared interests
  51. connected
    • time together more important
    • "shared friends"
    • togetherness
  52. enmeshed
    • total loyalty
    • little private space
    • little outside contact
  53. rigid
    • one person in charge
    • highly controlling environment
    • roles strictly defined
  54. structured
    • democratic leadership
    • some discussion w/ kids
    • few rule changes
    • rules enforced
  55. flexible
    • egalitarian leadership
    • shared roles
    • rules change - age appropriate
  56. chaotic
    • limited/no leadership
    • decisions are impulsive
    • roles shift
  57. using rituals
    • establish meaning
    • rites of passage
    • create identity
  58. dismemberment
    push people away
  59. contention
    ritual becomes a time of fighting and distancing
  60. fragmentation
    • ritual is reinvented every year
    • don't know what to expect
  61. trivialization
    remaking and commercializing the ritual
  62. liking
  63. infatuation
  64. empty love
  65. romance
    intimacy and passion
  66. companionship
    intimacy and commitment
  67. fatuous love
    passion and commitment
  68. consumate love
    intimacy, passion, commitment
  69. how culture influences romantic relationships
    • scripts: how to act and think in relationships
    • feedback on relationships: standards and criteria to evaluate our relationships
    • informs progression: benchmarks to understand relationship progression
  70. prenuptual cohabitation
    • ambiguous: unbalanced couple plans
    • relaxed: no hurry to marry
    • direct: short-term, direct marital plans
  71. dating cohabitation
    • non-marital: no plans to marry
    • ambiguous: unbalanced couple plans