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Need to belong
a hypothesis that says each of us is born with a fundamental drive to seek, form, maintain, and protect strong social relationships
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Interpersonal attraction
any force that draws people together to form a relationship
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Physical attraction
attraction to someone's physical appearance
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Social attraction
attraction to someone's personality
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Task attraction
attraction to someone's abilities and dependability
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Uncertainty reduction theory
a theory suggesting that people are motivated to reduce their uncertainty about others
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Predicted outcome value theory
a theory predicting that we form relationships when we think the effort will be worth it
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Approach behaviors
communication behaviors that signals one's interest in getting to know someone
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Avoidance behaviors
communication behaviors that signal one's lack of interest in getting to know someone
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Social exchange theory
a theory predicting that people seek to form and maintain relationships in which the benefits outweigh the costs
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Comparison level
a person's realistic expectation of what the person wants and thinks he/she deserves from a relationship
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Comparison level for alternatives
a person's assessment of how good his/her current relationship is, compared with other options
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Over-benefited
the state in which one's relational rewards exceeds one's costs
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Under-benefited
the state in which one's relational costs exceed one's relational rewards
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Equity theory
a theory predicting that a good relationship is one in which a person's ratio of costs and rewards is equal to that of the person's partner
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Relational maintenance behaviors
behaviors used to maintain and strengthen personal relationships
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Peer
someone of similar power or status
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Intimacy
significant emotional closeness experienced in a relationship
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Commitment
a desire to stay in a relationship
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Interdependence
a state in which each person's behaviors affect everyone else in their relationship
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Investment
the resources we put into our relationships
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Dialectical tensions
conflicts between two important but opposing needs or desires
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Monogamy
being in only one romantic relationship at a time
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Infidelity
having romantic or sexual interaction with someone outside of romantic relationship
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Polygamy
practice in which one person is married to 2+ spouses at once
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Initiating stage
the stage of relationship development when people meet and interact for the first time
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Experimenting stage
the stage of relationship development when individuals have conversations to learn more about each other
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Intensifying stage
the stage of relationship development when individuals move from being acquaintances to being close friends
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Integrating stage
the stage of relationship development when a deep commitment has formed, and there is a strong sense that the relationship has its own identity
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Bonding stage
the stage of relationship development when the partners publicly announce their commitment
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Communication privacy management (CPM) theory
theory that explains how people manage the tension between privacy and disclosure
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Differentiating stage
when partners begin to see their differences as undesirable or annoying
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Circumscribing stage
decreased quality and quantity of communication between partners
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Stagnating stage
relationship stops growing and the partners are barely communicating with each other
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Avoiding stage
when partners create physical and emotional distance between themselves
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Terminating stage
relationship is deemed to be officially over
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Divorce
legal discontinuation of a marriage
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Family of origin
(consists of?)
- family in which one grows up
- often consisting of one's parents & siblings
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Family of procreation
(consists of?)
- family in which one starts as an adult
- often consisting of one's spouse and children
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Rituals
repetitive behaviors that have special meaning for a group or relationship
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Communication climate
the emotional tone of a relationship
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Confirming messages
behaviors that indicate how much we value another person
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Disconfirming messages
behaviors that imply a lack of regard for another person
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Defensiveness
excessive concern with guarding oneself against the threat of criticism
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Supportiveness
a person's feeling of assurance that others car about and will protect them
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Non-evaluative feedback
reply that withholds assessment of what the speaker has said or done
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Evaluative feedback
reply that offers an assessment of what the speaker has said or done
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Interpersonal conflcit
an expressed struggle between interdependent parties who perceive incompatible goals, scarce resources, and interference from one another
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Passive agression
a pattern of behaving vengefully while denying that one has aggressive feelings
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Demand-withdraw pattern
a pattern of behavior in which one party makes demands and the other party withdraws from the conversation
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Disinhibition effect
tendency to say or do things in one environment (such as online) that one would not say or do in most other enviornments
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Power
ability to manipulate, influence, or control other people or events
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Symmetrical relationship
relationship between parties of equal power
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Complementary relationship
a relationship between parties of unequal power
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One-up message
verbal message through which the speaker attempts to exert dominance or gain control over the listener
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One-down message
a verbal message that reflects acceptance of, or submission to, another person's power
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One-across message
a verbal message that seeks to neutralize relational control and power
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Reward power
power that derives from the ability to reward
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Coercive power
power based on the ability to punish
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Referent power
power that derives from one's attraction to or admiration for another
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Legitimate power
power based on one's status or position
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Expert power
power that derives from one's expertise, talent, training, specialized knowledge, or experience
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Criticism
the expression of complaints about another party
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Contempt
the expression of insults and attacks on another's self worth
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Defensiveness
the tendency to deny that validity of criticisms directed at the self
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Stonewalling
withdrawing from a conversation or an interaction
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Competing
strategy for managing conflict in which one's goal is to win while the other party loses
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Avoiding
strategy for managing conflict that involves ignoring or failing to deal with the conflict
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Accommodating
strategy for managing conflict that involves giving in to the other party's needs and desires while subordinating one's own
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Compromising
strategy for managing conflict in which both parties give up something they want so that both can receive something they want
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Collaboration
strategy for managing conflict that involves working toward a solution that meets both parties' needs
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