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what is style?
- a way (recognizable) to distinguish how something is done or accomplished
- what they do and say in conflict
- a habitual way of communicating
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What are 4 conflict styles?
- 1. direct aggression
- 2. cave/ give in
- 3. withdraw
- 4. Compromise/ negotiate
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what is personality style?
- stable patterns of thinking and behaving/ acting
- personality and conflict style can change based on who you are in conflict with such as authority, equal or subordinate
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Is the personality style and conflict style are always the same?
no not always
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what is a bully?
- person who belittles (mentally/ verbally) and or taunts, shames, physically harasses, or is any way harassed, threatens directly or indirectly another person over a period of time.
- exclusion/ isolation spreading rumors and gossip, insult, slurs
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what are the reasons someone bullies another?
- they percieve the other person as weak, a threat
- they are competitive, jealous, envious
- they have differences and are looked at as non conforming, unpopular, inferiour
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Do people have a bullying bias?
yes
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what is a difficult person?
- someone who blames others and avoids taking responsibility
- blame others when it is not their fault
- directly confrontational
- indirectly confrontational
- storms off
- ignores what is said
- raises voice and using a nasty tone
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Why are people difficult?
- to have control and be in power
- to achieve an end goal
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what is losing face?
credibility/ humiliation
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what is self image?
- how we see ourselves and what we present to the world
- aesthetics/ style (upscale, trendy athletic)
- choices of style
- what we look and what it means
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what is self-concept?
how we think of ourselves (kind, generous, giving)
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what is self-esteem?
- how we "feel" about ourselves
- results in our successes/ failures (people think it is a factor)
- whether we like ourselves and who we are
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Reasons for a bully to interrupt?
- want to control the conversation
- don't want to hear things they cannot accept
- end the flow of words
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what is unearned criticism?
- accused unjustly of generic faults
- making someone feel at fault when they are not
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what is the reason behind unearned criticism?
making someone feel at fault when they are not
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bullies are all difficult people but are all difficult people bullies?
no
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what are cyber bullies?
- one of the most difficult to deal with
- deals with using technology to bully others
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what is mobbing/ psychological terror?
- when a group of people have more credibility than the target
- backhanded comments, insulting, talking about you, ignoring you,
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what makes mobbing so difficult?
it expands and moves outside the original circle of bullies
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how do bullies disregard victims?
they make claims about the persons mental state
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What happens in psychological bullying? (2 things)
- 1. the bully attacks the targets sense of reality asking: is it my fault? did I cause it? Are they right?
- 2. Make observers question: the mental state (sanity), and the overall competence/ legitimacy of the target
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What do the bullies do in psychological bullying?
- 1. Claims the target is crazy
- 2. Spread rumors that others believe
- 3. Give or take away responsibilities or assignments (fail)
- 4. Isolation/ exclusion (ignoring) all about power
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what does the psychological affect on a target?
emotions, thought processes, self esteem/concept/image, affects how the individual talks, acts, behaves, intense feelings of despair/ hopelessness/ helplessness
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